Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
