i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
