But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
