you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
it was like his penis was on wheels.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
Randomize
