TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Randomize
