"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
