there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
