After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
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