I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize
