Don't you send me to vm
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
should my penis look like a turkey
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
