We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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