is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
Randomize