Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
