no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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