i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
