Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Randomize
