Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
Life seems so much brighter and more vibrant after you have sex with a 20 year old. It's like how Kansas was in black and white and Oz was in technicolor.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
Randomize