Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
