Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
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