I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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