I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Randomize
