so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
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