Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
