I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
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