She said her name was "party"
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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