she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Randomize
