Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
