Soap is not a condiment
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Randomize