the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Why did I ever allow that penis to enter my sacred temple?
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
It's like jay gatsby himself preordained that our genitals meet again.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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