Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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