): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Success! We fucked roommates!
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize