You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
