talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
