What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
