I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
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