Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
