when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
