8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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