Nicole vs. Life
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Randomize
