my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Someone signed my nipple.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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