Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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