Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Randomize
