bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
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