sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
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