I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
