normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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