i think my mom watched the whole time
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
Randomize