I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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