garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize