im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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