i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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