THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
Panties = found
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
